It’s not you, it’s me

Welcome to Mayhem Ensues post #100!

*sounds of a cheering crowd*

For those of you clever folks who might try to read between the lines, this post has nothing to do with anything that’s happened or anyone I’ve met lately. It’s a post I’ve been meaning to make for a little while now. It’s more or less a prelude to a related, but different post to follow in a few weeks. I’m thinking around Valentine’s Day.

So…

In this spirit of positive introspection that’s so recently taken me, I feel it’s about time to talk about another thing I’ve discovered about myself within the past year or so. It’s yet another in a string of things I would have already known if I’d just paid enough attention. Even mom, with whom I never talk about such things, noticed it before I did.

And it’s that, when it comes to women, I’m picky as hell.

Not picky in the traditional sense, not about looks. I mean obviously I have to be attracted to a woman physically, but my standards are not unrealistic. After all, you’ve seen me, and we all know that would be more than a little hypocritical. To quote Rob Gordon, “You gotta punch your own weight.”

No, I’m picky about the worst thing you could be picky about: personality.

When I comb through online personals, I look not for women I’d like, but for women I think would like me. Because even though I just got through telling you I was picky, I think there’s more of the former than the latter. There’s a long list of additional criteria, certainly more than I could go into here, and it’s not relevant anyway. (However, liking Star Trek doesn’t exactly hurt your chances.)

The point is that I’ve noticed this about myself, but I don’t consider it a negative. I don’t think having standards is a bad thing. I fully realize that it makes the task of finding a mate that much harder, but I’m OK with that.

I also realize it makes me more vulnerable to that phenomenon to which all men have fallen victim at one time or another: Looking for the “bigger and better” deal. However, knowing of it makes me better equipped to guard against it. Not that I’m immune, but it beats being ignorant.

I can’t really go into more detail without going into my whole philosophy about mate-hunting, which I’m afraid is a post for another day. But stay tuned, there’s more to come!